The Giving Hat

Seven years ago I was sitting in the hospital being treated like a superhero, but all I really wanted to do was visit with him; I wanted to know that he was ok, to make sure that all of this wasn’t done in vain. Turns out, it wasn’t! He was fine. Better than fine; he was alive, and his body was fully functioning with its new kidney. I thank God everyday for speaking to me and telling me to do this. I thank God that my dear friend is still alive and well; no more dialysis, no more extensive doctor’s visits, no more missing church. No more worries about what tomorrow will bring. He has his whole life ahead of him and he owes me only one thing…to live it wholeheartedly and for the Lord above who brought us together.

Thank you Rick for being so strong, I’ve learned so much more from you than you could ever imagine. Thank you for not treating me any differently but thank you for treating me like the sister I am; the sister in Christ and the sister that our alleles prove I am. You are my hero and, for all that you are, I thank you.

Here’s to seven years and many, many more!

Tired...just tired!

Have you ever been so tired that you have no idea what hat you are wearing? That’s exactly how I’ve been feeling lately.

My daughter is almost 13 years old and she’s acting every bit of it! She’s KILLING me! She has no desire to spend any time with her family and when she does all I hear is fighting. She has an attitude that won’t quit and complaints that trump everything else in this world. Ugh! There’s my sTrEsS Hat!

The boys? Oh, yes! The Boys! They are restless and anxious and antsy and driving me insane! “Go OUTSIDE!!!” “But it’s too hot outside,” “We want to play the Wii,” “Mom, we’re HUNGRY!!” Ugh! I need a hat with earplugs!

My husband? I actually have no complaints about my husband…this time! Oh, there may be a serenity hat in here after all!

Let’s talk about family! There’s an old saying, “God gave us friends to apologize for the family he gave us!” Shock of all shockers, this quote has remained anonymous! I would probably refrain from attaching my name to it, as well. But, yes, I’m using it in my blog. Only because it’s a pretty safe bet that any family who is reading this blog is not the family I’m referring to.  I am so tired of the lack of support! I AM a published book author! Read it again…I AM A PUBLISHED AUTHOR!!! Why is it that I still have family who has not read my book? Why am I friends with them on Facebook but they won’t be a fan of my book’s fan page?? Family that won’t even acknowledge the fact that a book even exists?? Family that has NEVER even said, “Congratulations”? And, I’m not mad…I’m crushed! It breaks my heart that I have so little of a place in your heart that a simple “Congratulations” can’t even touch your lips. I’m hurt and it upsets me (I guess if you are reading this that’s probably what you want to hear, that you’ve hurt me, isn’t it?) – pretty sure this is my Sad Hat L

Now, let’s talk about “friends!” I put that in quotes for a reason and I’m sure you’ve figured out that the friends who are reading this are the true ones! No, fellow bloggers and readers, the “friends” I’m referring to are not friends at all. They are the people who pretend they like you then tell all of their friends what a #&$@ you are (fill in any four letter word you want, I’m sure they have all been used). The people who gossip about you behind your back, the ones who make Facebook uncomfortable and the ones you wish, every time they talk to you, that this is the one time that they are being sincere. But, I feel like I’m already broken, past the point of no return, and I find it hard to trust them and even myself when I’m around them. This is definitely my Discouraged Hat!

I woke up on Sunday morning, went to church, came home and went back to bed. I woke up around 5:00 and had dinner (my wonderful husband made it and it was DELISH!) then went back to bed. I woke up at 9:00 this morning and I still feel like I’ve been hit by a bus. I feel sluggish, lazy and tired…just plain tired! Ugh! I think I’m going to take off all of my hats now and go back to bed...

Camp!

She’s gone…for a week! No communication, no texting, no phone calls, nothing! For a whole week! I’m not sure who’s more excited about it; her father, her or me!?!

It still doesn’t hide my worry hat…

No communication! Oh, sure, I can send her letters and emails but I can’t get anything in return. Not even a nod from the camp counselor saying “She’s fine, Mom!” “Don’t worry, Mom!” “It was just a scratch and we took care of it just like you would, Mom!” Nothing, Nada, Zilch!

Wait! Look there, under my arm, what’s that? It’s my party hat!!!

On Monday, July 4, 2011, I will have NO children! We are dropping the boys off for the weekend and my husband and I are going out. We may see a movie…or three! We may go to a fancy (or, not so much) restaurant and order everything on the menu and have drinks to go along with it!! (Uh! I gasp at the foreign thought!)

Let’s be sensible, shall we?! It’s only a week and she probably won’t miss us at all! This week will blow by and, before you know it, we will all be back to our normal selves and all this camp business and worry business will just be a distant memory.

But, while it’s still fresh in my mind – Yes, waiter, I will have another martini!